Home Bound

Desire for the Destination, Dedication for the Day

…“Behold, the tabernacle of God is among men, and He will dwell among them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself will be among them, and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away.”” (Revelation 21:3–4, NASB95)

My extraordinary wife, Michelle, has cancer. The cancer ‘type’ is mucosal melanoma, which is rare, accounting for just 1-2% of diagnosed melanomas. According to tests results subsequent to the diagnosis, the subtype of mucosal melanoma doctors believe is working inside Michelle is only 10-15% of diagnosed mucosal melanomas. So her cancer is rare amongst rare cancers.

The main cancer site is a tumor in her nose, but the first battery of tests revealed ‘innumerable’ cancerous lesions on her skull, spine, liver, and spleen.

Since I love to research, I prepared as much as possible to meet with the oncologist team in January 2026. There was no surprise when the doctor told us that while their team had experience with mucosal melanomas, they had little idea if treatments would work for Michelle or how Michelle’s body would respond to the cancer or to the treatments. The medical team offered to do their best and were confident their plan would work even as they confessed known limitations.

Michelle started with a combination of immunotherapy drugs the doctors believed would be effective. Immunotherapy drugs are designed to remove the internal (and helpful) barriers to a person’s immune system so that the God-designed tools within could find and attack the cancer. That therapy had no health benefit and was withdrawn after Michelle developed liver toxicity.

Michelle then received a single immunotherapy drug and had palliative radiation on her spine and the tumor. The radiation left Michelle in extreme pain and was ineffective in stopping or even measurably slowing the growth of the tumor or ‘cancerous lesions’ on her spine.

Michelle then applied for, and was accepted, into a clinical trial for a test drug that is designed to help the body identify cancer cells and to use the help of the immunotherapy drug to attack cancer cells. This treatment was also not successful in stopping or measurably slowing the advance of the cancer in Michelle.

We did discover that Michelle is not morphine tolerant. Morphine removed pain but also took Michelle’s ability to do much of anything other than sleep and vomit. Not fun!

While participating in the clinical trial, Michelle developed a cancer-induced full fracture in one of her vertebrae. She is now high risk for severe spinal cord damage and is in continual pain. Fortunately the alternates to morphine work well enough to manage the pain and she is able to do many of the things she enjoys (like hang out with the grandkids, cook treats, keep house, and tell me where I left things I can’t find).

About two weeks ago the sponsor of the clinical trial determined that the test drug and immunotherapy were not providing any medical benefit, so they removed her from the trial.

We pursued another clinical trial and Michelle’s application was rejected by the trial sponsor due to the aforementioned liver toxicity as well as other ‘excluding factors.’

We applied for yet another clinical trial and there are no ‘slots’ available for that study. Joining that study is still a possibility, but the likelihood of the hospital getting a slot is low and then Michelle would still need be qualified by the sponsor.

We visited with a neurosurgeon to see if the vertebral fracture was medically repairable. The doctor wants to do surgery, but needed specific scans of her bone structure to see the extent of the damage from the cancer. We are waiting for that scan and will discuss the outcome with the surgeon July 15th.

So, for the near future Michelle will focus on managing her pain and try not to do any injury to herself. There is no medical intervention directed at healing the cancer and will not be for at least a month.

We never left the place where we started. This cancer was formally diagnosed in December 2025. We knew that it was not a cancer that could be cured, only treated. We knew that even treatment could do immense damage and create a ‘quality of life’ issue that would be untenable. So we committed to trust the Lord, do the best we could day-by-day and press on.

God has been so good to us. Our church family has graced us over and over again in many ways. What a joy to see the body of Christ love as God intended it to do. We are greatly humbled to be the recipients of such grace and strengthened immeasurably.

Our children have supported and encouraged us. We are particularly enthralled that our ‘middle’ daughter, her husband and their children (I prefer ‘our grandchildren’) came back to the US from their station in South Korea. They will spend the summer with us courtesy of the United States Army’s medical care for our son-in-law.

Michelle has not been admitted to the hospital once since the diagnosis, which is miraculous. Many hundreds of thousands of dollars of medical bills are being covered by our insurance, drug companies and the sponsor of the clinical trial.

We will have some difficult choices to make in the next few weeks, but we both want to see God’s shine made greater through this circumstance. We’ve been able to share our faith over and over again. What a privilege that is to declare the grace of God to those who need to hear of God’s goodness.

We would, of course, be happy to see God heal Michelle’s spine and have asked for that gift. We would be happy to see God take away the cancer from Michelle’s body and have also asked for that gift. We would also be happy for God to do something we are not imaginative enough to ask for, but that would impress all who know with His greatness.

We hold firmly to these truths:

• God is good, only does good. and will work out good even from the most terrible circumstance.
• We all are dying, but those in Christ are promised eternal life in the best place. Death has no hold on us.

Please pray with us that Michelle does not damage or sever her spinal cord. Please pray with us that the upcoming bone scans will provide good information and that we make wise decisions regarding intervention at the site of the fractured vertebrae. Please pray that we will be content to receive God’s best regardless of whether or not it is the ‘miracle’ we’ve been asking for for months

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